I Guess I'm Not As Strong As I Used To Be

Yeah, that last post was kind of a cop-out. Can we just let that slide? You expect more from me, and I expect more from me. So, to make it up to you, the half-dozen or so consistent readers hailing from all over the country, I decided to give you a little extra this week. Maybe I'm getting softer in my old age. Maybe I'm actually enjoying doing this after about 3.5 years or so. Maybe I like the warmth of a laptop on my lap while I'm watching a movie. I don't know. Odds are, it's all of them combined. Regardless, I hope you enjoy this, because I slammed it all out in the space of about 20 minutes and I'm going with it.

First thing I'd like to bring up: I hate my phone. When I got back from St. Maarten, one of the first things I needed to do was get a new cell phone (side note: I kind of miss not having a cell phone. Make no mistake, my phone lies unbothered for well over 85% of the day, so it's not that I'm getting overwhelmed by call or text volume. It's the exact opposite reason why I miss not having a cell phone. I miss not having to look at the phone, and realize there are no calls or texts. Cue the cheesy rift of "Lowered Expectations"). Turns out, they're kind of critical in today's society. If you don't believe me, go on a cruise and see how much different your life is for that week. Anyway, I did a little research, and decided to go with the Palm Pre Plus. Yep. Palm is A ) still around and B ) makes cell phones. I had read the reviews and realized that it was a nice balance of what I wanted: A slide, not flip, phone; tactile buttons; camera; and email. Additionally, it would only cost me about $50. The iPhone 4 was a possibility, but a possibility that had a $100-200 tag on it (I can't remember how much, but it was noticeably more than the Palm Pre). I saw a couple blackberry options, but honestly, I didn't like the idea of a blackberry. It seemed like too much machine for me. I like things simple. Above all, I like things simple.

I spend the better parts of my day thinking of complex scenarios and situations. Needlessly mind you, but that's what I do. I look around the room and think about things like "What if there was a fire and that exit is blocked?" Or "Is there a better way to lay out the furniture?" Or "Is it worth it to try and invest the little savings I have in a business venture, or just to let it slowly grow by interest?" And those are just the not sports or girls related ones. I'd share those, but really, they'd either bore, impress, confuse or upset you. Three of those I try to avoid. 25% chance? Not worth the risk.

Back to the phone. So I've had this one for about 5 months now. And I hate it. I'm already on a replacement because the power button, which is practically the only mechanical button outside the keyboard, stopped working. Kind of an important button. Additionally, about a month back it stopped receiving picture messages. An hour or so with customer services, and it worked again. Last week, back to not being able to receive pictures. Worst of all, the ability to search the internet is spotty, and that's kind. If I'm moving at all, forget about it. It's a step above having to be in wi-fi area, and that's it. Smart phone my tuckus.

Went to the ATT store because they have that fantastic promo to get the iPhone 3gs for just $50. I was hoping I could renew my agreement, pay the $50, turn in the crap phone I have and then be done with it. I realize that my phone bill would likely increase on the monthly basis, but for the added features, not to mention the fact that it works nearly all the time, worth it. Unfortunately, they won't let me sign into a new agreement until August. Of 2012. Great. I understand exactly why. Heck, I go over this same issue on a daily basis with the people I talk to at my job. No harm, no foul. Then the guy tells me that I could buy the phone off of KSL. When people in Utah say KSL, I instantly translate that into eBay. Not that I don't check KSL classifieds, but I check eBay first because, well I know it, and I trust it. Turns out, even a used iPhone 3gs with 8gb is going to run me about $200. Even if I sell my Palm Pre over the same medium, the net cost is about $100-125. And I'm still not sure what my monthly bill would move to. A lot of questions, not a lot of answers. If you have the answers, such as how much the monthly bill for an iPhone would be, that would be great.

Second thing: Been on the dating scene now for a couple months. I can tell you this: It's exactly the same as when I left it. Handful of courageous guys (some might use other adjectives, but I'll go with this one because I know the chutzpah it takes to do what they do) willing to walk up to any and every girl in the room, engage in brief but meaningful conversation, and request a phone number. Bunch of girls always in small groups of 2-4 talking amongst themselves while also noticing whom else is in the room. And the bulk of people just milling about as though there wasn't any social undercurrent trying to steer people together.

I used to be part of that first group. Believe me when I say, there is a not a scenario that I have not asked for a girl's number in. I'm not proud of them all, but I've done them all. In a class? Of course. At church? You betcha. Those are the easy ones. How about at a party where your friends are leaving and you just noticed her on your way out? Yessir. What about while at McDonalds and ordering food? Indeed. After going through a temple session? Sure did.

Now, oh man, I wait forever to ask for a girl's number. Truthfully, I like for there to be a solid reason other than "I want to ask you out", when I ask for their number. This is two-fold: 1) increase my odds of the second date (the first date is almost a given. It's the second date that is always up in the air. However, last girl I tried to ask out, definitely said no when I first asked her out. But that's certainly more than exception than the rule), 2) allows both of us to become comfortable around each other. This is more for their sake than mine. If you read this, you likely know me. If you know me, you know that I'm more or less comfortable all the time, especially in low body count situations.

I just don't have the stamina that these young bucks do, going into the fray time and again. Nor do I have the resilience of getting on the horse and bucked off on a weekly basis. Just don't got it in me anymore. Now-a-days, I pick my spots that I feel are higher percentages. Goodness knows, I'm not always right, but I play the odds. The downside is your volume goes down. Dramatically. Let me rephrase that. My volume goes down. Some guys seem to fall bass ackwards from one relationship into another, or from one girl to another (yes, there's a difference, a rather large difference). I'm not in that group.

What I'm saying is that the dating scene has not changed in the least. I have changed in the most. Not sure why, just know that I can't go back. This isn't good because I have to relearn how to maneuver. It's like I moved from shortstop to right field. Nothing against right field, but it gets far less activity, and demands less agility and resilience than playing shortstop. Still the same game, but completely different skills.

Third thing: I'm getting a Utah driver's license on Tuesday. My Florida one expires that day, and I can't renew it by mail. I figure that I won't be going to grad school in Florida, so there's no advantage to maintaining residence there. I might attend grad school in Utah, might as well get the in-state discount. Additionally, just because I have a Utah license, does not mean I have to register my car in Utah. No emissions or safety tests for me, thank you very much. I'll keep that $35 a year in my pocket.

I am sad to let the Florida license go though. It's been with me for so many thousands of miles. I'm not sure how many because the car I drove in college had a broken odomoter. I can tell you that I've driven my current car about 52,000 miles in the 3.5 years I've owned it. Oh, and it was parked in a warehouse for 1.5 of those years. I have to figure that I at least double that amount in the other car, and then added about 40k during high school. All in all, that license has seen me through about 200,000 miles. It is probably the oldest thing I still currently own. Except for my alarm clock. Had that thing since day 1 of the mission. Alas, all good things come to an end.

Fourth: I still really like tootsie rolls. I've been working on a bag this weekend. Got about 8 left. Don't ask for them. You won't get them.

Word.

I'm Turning Off A Real Live Drive And That's Right I'm Hitting Easy Street In Mud Tires

For those of you who don't know, it's more or less been raining here in Utah since I got back from Oakland. It has cost me countless softball games, golf rounds and sunny days. Not too pleased, but since I still can't control the weather, so be it.

I guess I should talk about the fact that I went to Oakland two weeks ago. They were still on my list of teams I haven't seen at their home, and the White Sox were in town that weekend, so I dragged my brother over there. Had it been any other team, no way I would have done it. Spent more time driving then actually enjoying the Bay Area. And, in case there ever is a contest for most boring interstate, my vote has to go to I-80. And I don't think it's that close. As soon as you leave Chicago, there is nothing worth seeing until you get to SLC. From there, you have absolutely nothing until Wendover (and calling Wendover something is very generous) and then even more nothingness until Reno. After Reno, you go through the mountain range, and then its a stream of cities leading up to Sacramento and then Oakland. But for the vast majority, you just want to self-medicate the trip. I kid you not, it might have been worth it to ride a train or bus, just so you wouldn't have to be awake through that nonsense.

Once there, things went well. Yes, my White Sox lost, but they played alright. Gavin Floyd was on the mound, and I knew from the first couple batters we were in for trouble. He couldn't keep the ball down at all, and you can only survive so long throwing up in the zone. They broke through for a crooked number early, and that was during the stretch where we decided to leave all of our bats in the dugout, so we could never catch back up. I wasn't happy, but it happens. No one wins them all. And right now, we're still losing more than we win. At least we're hitting the ball again, and winning more than once a week.

After the game, we realized that the San Jose Earthquakes, local MLS team, was playing that night, and that San Jose was only about an hour away from Oakland. Why not? Nothing else really going on in the Bay area, so we trekked down there and caught the game. Side note: Northern California has substantially different weather than Southern California. I had packed a pair of jeans because I knew jeans worked in all situations. What I should have packed was my snow board pants, a sweater, a jacket and a beanie. So cold. Got a hot chocolate, which helped a little, but not enough. Went to their merchandise trailer (yes trailer. The field was a college's field, and the stands looked like they were from some high school football field. It was ridiculous knowing one team played here, and another team in the same league played at Rio Tinto. Like having one twin look like Reese Witherspoon, and the other look like Rihanna after Chris Brown let the hands go on her) and asked if they had a beanie. The only thing they had close was a beanie-scarf. It's exactly what it sounds like. And I wore it. And it kept me warm. No complaints.

On the drive home, it started snowing outside of Sacramento. I'm told it snows in that region maybe once or twice a year. I guess this was that once a year. We ended up having to put chains on. Now, I've heard of this practice, and I know people have done it, but I've never even seen it happen, much less had to do it myself. Thankfully, my brother's car had chain in the trunk, and some guys were there willing to put them on for us for only $25. (Huge rip-off, but we didn't know how to do it, so we figured better safe than sorry. Trust me when I say, save your money. This ain't hard to do. I can walk you through it over the phone if you need it) We had to drive about 25 mph up the canyon for about a half an hour. All in all, added about 3 hours onto our travel time. Ridiculous. Just another reason why I don't like the snow.

Also, this trip was done so close on the heels of the cruise because I was going to start teaching an MCAT class shortly thereafter. This is the one that they assigned me after the first one was canceled because no one signed up. The first session was last Wednesday night. I show up about 20 minutes early to prep and what-not. With about 1 minute to go, two people walked in. That was it. Yesterday, I was told that the class was canceled again because only three people total had signed up. So now, I'm more or less back in a holding pattern. I do have a potential GMAT course coming up in a month or so, but who knows now. It's getting to the point where all the re-scheduling is more than the job's worth. I'm not using this job to pay rent, I'm using this job to play golf.

So yeah. This post, not too exciting of a read, but I figure two weeks was a long enough absence. I'll probably throw something up again soon. Have a BBQ tomorrow, and have to get a new Driver's License on Tuesday. Turns out, those things expire. Who knew?

Word.

You'll Be My Sunny Day, I'll Be Your Shade Tree

[Second Editor's note: Turns out, Blogger.com revamped their site for whatever reason. To do so, they need to pull every post that had been put up between Monday and Wednesday. And then they decided to take out all the pictures I put in along with the captions I listed under them. So, now I'm having to re-do them. Lovely.]

[Editor's note: This first paragraph was written chronologically after the rest of the post, and then added once I remember to write about it. Hence the second paragraphs has it's own opening and the first paragraph doesn't flow at all with the rest of the post. I'm sure you all would have been outraged had I not explained all this. You're welcome.] First, and most certainly foremost, after almost two years of searching and collecting, I have finally completed the my collection of the entire 2005 Chicago White Sox World Series Roster Signed World Series baseballs. Timo Perez was the last holdout from all the 25 guys on the roster and Ozzie Guillen. Who is Timo Perez? Glad you asked. He was our fourth outfielder for the series and recorded one at bat, never reaching base. He played his last game at the major league level in 2007, so finding his signature was tough enough, but then to get it on the 2005 World Series baseball was quite the treat. I forgot to take a picture of the completed case holding all 26 balls as well as the official WS patch, and the replica WS trophy, but just picture it in your mind. Makes you smile doesn't it. Sure makes me smile.

There are some things I just don't mess around with. I don't drink 5 hour energy because it scares me. I don't watch anything with Matthew McConnaughey because I will leave more stupid than I entered. I don't ever touch a thermostat unless I'm the only one it affects because too many arguments have started over it.

I also don't mess around with sunburns. Spent a week or so in Florida and then on a cruise through the Caribbean. Brought about a dozen friends or so, and many of them were interested in getting a tan. We'd get to the beach or head out to the pool deck and they would gingerly put on a coat of SPF 15 or 30 and go about their day. Me? SPF 90 if could please. I would have gone with the 100, but it was the sport stuff that burns your eyes for about five minutes after you put it on. I don't care if I'm whiter than a cotton ball. I want no part of skin cancer. It runs in the family and I've already logged enough sun-hours growing up in Florida. So now-a-days, when I go to the beach, I put on a healthy layer of strong sun block.

Now, some of you might be thinking "If he put on all that sun block, how did he come back a little bit darker than when he left?" Golf is the answer my friends. For whatever reason, I usually forget to put sunblock on when I tee it up. So, after spending a weekend at the beach, a week on a cruise that went from beach to beach, the only sun I really got was at the golf course after all of that. And if you think I'm kidding, know that I wear a glove on my left hand when I golf, and believe that my right hand is noticeably darker than my left. Not a coincidence.

All in all though, the cruise was great. I love them. They're a hotel that travels to different places while you sleep. Oh, and they let you eat as much as you want. They'd deliver the menu and without fail, I would get 2-3 appetizers (really enjoyed their Ceasar salad, to the point that I had it every night), 2-3 entrees, and 2-3 desserts. Never went for the Trifecta of 3-3-3, but often wound up mowing through 8 total plates. And out of all of those plates, they all were delicious, except for the turkey. Just bad. Not dry, just without flavor. Yuk.

Annnnnd... here's the photo dump.

This is the whole group outside the house. Why we took the shot across the street and not in front of the house, I'm not sure. I'm guessing sun position, but there are still quite a lot of shadows.
If you thought I was kidding about finding the shade on the beach, you're dead wrong. There are about 60 beach loungers in front of me, most of which were empty. Me? I'm taking the wooden stool on the covered deck. And, as my sister pointed out, that sign was temporarily incorrect. If I'm there, there is a lifeguard on duty.
Just chilling at the Indialantic Beach boardwalk. I'm using boardwalk loosely, because the entire thing could be carried by a seven iron. And still, it's was the closest thing to a boardwalk outside of Cocoa Beach.
Best Billboard ever. I say, they shrink it down to business card size and hand them out at YSA activities. I realize we preach abstinence, but just in case, they should know to Protect Ya Tings.
Sometimes you really want to go swimming. And you're wearing a suit. And you don't see those two as being mutually exclusive. Side note: chlorine will change your suit forever. Not in a radiation-cloud-turned-johnny-storm-into-the-human-torch kind of way either.

Yes, that is the whole group throwing handstands. I'm just right of center. Still on the way up, hence I haven't locked my knees. However, my toes are still pointed. Thanks high school diving.